This song was written before 2016 election day, but it became more relevant afterward.
I wore a three piece suit to the white house
And would you believe they thought I was president?
And the best thing about being president,
Is that you don’t have to worry about the rent
And they gave me a big stack of files; I didn’t read them
Apparently I’m executive; I can’t believe it
So I put the congress in gridlock
And honestly? I didn’t give a fuck
Because I’m not really the president
I’m just a guy from Montreal with a three piece suit
Now I’ve come to realise the White House has 132 rooms
And now I’ve got a room with over 60 pairs of shoes
So forget foreign policy, it doesn’t really matter
And who actually cares about the economy?
Because when people assume you’re the president
They sure give you lots and lots of money
So you may as well stop voting
You may as well not care
Because if a guy from fucking Canada can become the president?
They’ll pick a guy from anywhere
from Up To December,
released January 15, 2017
Thanks to Hal for starting the improvisation session that led to this and thank you to Ray for giving me the idea to write about a guy from Montreal!